Mat Bowles

Insert Humour Here

They’re the same everywhere it appears…

Berlin Mayor is attacked for being tolerent.

The international leather and fetish scene is meeting for the
second time in Berlin … Welcome to Berlin

What’s wrong with saying that in a greeting to a festivel if you’re a major
politician of a leading EU capital city?

However, Mr Wowereit’s greeting did not please the conservative
Christian Democrats, who described the mayor’s message as “unspeakable”.

“Glorifying violence and sadomasochistic excesses is to begin opting out of
society,” said Nikolas Zimmer, the Christian Democrats’ leader in the Berlin
state legislature.

Posting by email from work; probably not a habit I want to get into, right?

August 31st, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | no comments

Gimme some help (to insomniacs and early risers out there)

My company is going through a process of corporate branding and agreed styles. Given some of the people we employ, in my opinion, this is a Good Thing. Unfortunately, sometimes the agreed styles aren’t what I would choose. Sometimes, they’re well, a Bad Thing.

By about mid afternoon tomorrow, I and one colleague have to have enough evidence together to convince the bosses that using rich text formatting on emails with embedded company logos for correspondence is a Bad Idea.

1) Compatability issues.

2) Bandwidth and filesize issues

3 [the big one]) Spam filters.

I know I’ve read a study online,r ecently, which criticised Amazon and similar for sending order confirmations in rich text with embedded pictures as these would trigger many spam filters. I also know this to be true, as I found 3 emails from Amazon in my junkmail folders.

Can I find it online? Can I buggery. I tried searching using amazon in the string, but half the web links to Amazon so that didn’t help.

So, any concerned citizens of the net out there that can assist in my research in any way, very much appreciated. Email should be plain text, anything else is unnecessary wastage. Why is it hard to explain this to people? We do business all over the world, we have no idea what our clients use to read their email, nor do we know what campatibiltity issues may be created, and we CANNOT afford to have our messages trigger spam filters.

On an entirely unrelated note; can anyone recommend some software I can download that I can use to store CDs as MP3s on my harddrive and play them? I don’t need to download stuff, I can just store it and play it, right?

August 30th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | 11 comments

Blair: The Machiavelli test

Interesting analysis of Blair’s rule on .

He may not be a prince among men, but he can claim to be a genuine success in a sea of mediocrity.

Always did like Machiavelli’s writing style, but prefer his approach in the Discourses. Ah well, time to actually shut down and drive to Exeter.

August 28th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | 3 comments

Here is the news. Or at least, the stuff I want to talk about anyway…

Google isn’t the new M$, and isn’t showing signs of predatory anti-competetive practices. Is’s just, um, taking over the web. Unlike , I’m not convinced Google is evil. But I’m also no longer of the opinion Google is the best service in the world ever. HMV is trying to buy Ottakar’s but faces competition from a mangement buy out. I think I’m with the managers; the local Ottakar’s is great, whereas I’ve never been too keen on HMV stores. Besides, they may merge the chains, and then there would be less space for books; I buy my DVDs online these days so what do I need HMV for? On the other hand The Post Office wants to rival WH Smiths. Um, OK? I know they’ve got to be a commercial company these days (not happy about it, but it’s the way it is) but trying to compete head on with Smiths and Argos? Meh.

Venezuala limits visiting preachers. Can’t actually say I blame them after Marion’s outburst; would you let a dodgy US preacher into the country without checking if he was a fan of the bloke that wants your elected President shot? On the other hand Gorgeous George is going on tour. I’d avoid those red states George, they’ve got a lot of… Wait a minute. George, go to Texas, they’ll love you there! Even when I agree with him I still can’t stand the man.

Talking of men we don’t like, Mandelson is in trouble again. Hmmm “I believe in free trade” except when it may mean EU businesses being outcompeted. “I didn’t realise they’d produce that much when we removed the trade barriers”; um, you do know that China is a big place, right Pete? “We need to stop all these cheap imports”, but not actually consult the people that would need to be warned in advance nor pay attention to the business cycle. OTOH, bras in the headlines every day, but the moralists are squirming…

More blokes I don’t, in theory, like. How am I agreeing with Birt? He wants to strengthen Channel 4, increase the intellectual output while at the same time allow puerile crap for the masses like I’m a Celebrity stay on air. All things to all people from the former bean counter extraordinaire? Still not planning to start watching TV any time soon. Still, good news over the pond, Bush is at only 40% approval with 56% thinking he’s doing a bad job. See, I keep saying not all Americans are stupid. Not even all Texans…

Blokes we do like: Lula is clamping down on illegal logging causing a decrease in the rate of deforestation. So the rainforests are still being destroyed, but a lot less quickly. Not perfect, but better. Now if only we could persuade our subsidist western govts to encourage reforestation instead of over production up here in the ‘developed’ world. The woods on Granddads farm were the best bits, even if his neighbours thought he was daft for keeping them not turning them into more grazing space.

Last one for now. Shoot someone? Complain when the public get told. I know, I know, we don’t have all the facts, the bad bits not the whole story was leaked, Ian Blair may not be liar extraordinaire, etc. Still, mistakes happen, they were under pressure, etc. Still doesn’t justify lying about it for 72 hours.

August 27th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | no comments

Ye Bastarde Operatore frome Helle

Ye Bastarde Operatore frome Helle

Amused me no end. always did like the Scottish Play.

August 27th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | 4 comments

Reviews: Some books I’ve read recently

Well, it’s about time I got around to writing up the books I’ve read recently. Well, the good ones, anyway. The avarage are for fans, the poor, well, less said about them the better, really.

Steph Swainston: the YEAR OF OUR WAR & no PRESENT LIKE TIME
I’d of course read reviews of these, and seen the first on the shelves, nearly buying it a few times. Then someone really recommended I pick them up. So, I bought the first one and added it to the pile. I eventually got around to starting it, and, well, didn’t really stop reading it all weekend. I’m prone to enjoy books, and picking up sequels/other books by authors I like is usual. It’s unusual, however, to finish one book and take time from work, on a busy day, to specifically go to the book shop to buy the sequel. It is that good.

Premise: fantasy world, continent referred to as The Fourlands, ruled by secular, mortal monarchs but advised and protected in times of war by an immortal Emperor and his cadre of chosen immortals, who are given their status on merit, and may lose their immortality if a better mortal than they in their chosen field comes along. There’s a war on; the Insects are invading in greater numbers, and the insecure Messenger is a little exhausted. Given that many of his friends are dying, his wife is having an affair and he’s the only man alive that can fly, he turns to drugs. Very New Weird.
Mat’s verdict: Buy these books. Now.

China Miéville: King Rat
I was first persuaded to buy one of China’s books (his second novel, Perdido St Station) by Vince in the book shop int he departures lounge at Manchester before my first trip across the pond. Best book I read during the whole holiday (and I read a lot). Miéville in some ways has a Gaimanesque style, but his later works are set in the fantasy world of Bas Lag. This is very much set in his London. It’s his first novel, and I approached it with trepidation; his next 3 are amongst my favourites and two won deserved Arthur C Clarke awards, but first books can be, for a more recent convert, disappointing. Fortunately, my fear was misplaced. He’s definately improved as a writer, but from a pretty good start. OF course, reading his Wiki entry shows me why; I knew he’s a little to the left of me (making me actually look a little reactionary), but didn’t know he’s got a PhD in economics, nor that he’s a contributor to one of my more favoured recently discovered blogs, Lenin’s Tomb. I digress, to the book.

Imagine you’ve been out of London for a few days, and return to the flat you share with you father late and exhausted. You wake the next morning to find yourself under arrest; your father’s body was found under the window, how could you have missed it? Then, to make matters worse, you’re sprung from jail by a man claiming he’s your uncle with supernatural powers. A man who claims to be King of the Rats, the only survivor of Hamelin. On the run, attempting to prove your innocence, you hide in the sewers with him and watch your life get turned upside down. A fusion of the drum and bass / jungle culture of the time with aspects reminiscent of Neverwhere, King Rat is an interesting, and at times challenging read. The detective fiction bits don’t work as well, but, well, I didn’t buy it because it’s a cop novel.
Mat’s verdict: For the fans, but if you like Gaiman or his later work…

Jasper Fforde: the Thursday Next books
I picked up the 4th book, Something Rotten, again, in an airport book shop. But had planned to already buy some Fforde on the recommendations of the friend who subsequently recommended Swainston. It was great, and I ended up lending it to another friend (a Tom Holt/ Piers Anthony fan as well as recent Pratchett convert), who tells me he’s enjoying it (some people, I’m now finding out, don’t read at least 2 books a week. I’m sure I’ll get used to this idea). Putting it in an obvious way; I read the 4th book first in May, and have now read the first 3 as well. Each is good, and of particular interest to fans of literature in general; references from all over the place, from Shakespeare (the award for most pathetic Shakespeare lead goes to…) and Will Speak machines on street corners, through Wuthering Heights all the way to pulp cowboy novels and trashy sci-fi.

Thursday is a Literary Detective who investigates crimes against fiction, book smuggling and fake originals She gets swept up in a very surreal story, and by the start of book 4 she’s living inside a novel as head of Jurisfiction, one of the few Outworld (ie real) people that can live in the word of fictional characters. HEr daughter’s babysitter is a talking gorilla, and her pet Dodo is laying eggs. The dodo, of course, is real, she cloned it as a kid with her brother, who died during the Crimean War, which has now been going on for more than 100 years. It’s funny, very clever, full of in jokes and, well, surreal. I’m even considering going to the first FfordeCon if tickets are still available. I don’t do fan conventions, do I?
Mat’s verdict: If you like your humour clever, and love reading, you’ll love it. If you can’t tell your Heathcliff from your Marlowe, you may want to give it a miss.

Books to avoid: Dracula Cha Cha Cha by Kim Newman; bought it on remainder as I liked his pulp Warhammer tie ins written as Jack Yeovil. I can see why it’s on remainder. Anything by Laurell K Hamilton. She has her fans, but, well, she can’t write sex scenes for toffee, and as that’s the only reason she seems to be writing now, you might as well buy some decent porn.

August 25th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | one comment

Spaghettie, memes and John Peel



Popular interests among matgb’s friends
1. music (21) 11. sarcasm (11)
2. industrial (17) 12. exeter (11)
3. metal (16) 13. synthetic culture (11)
4. reading (15) 14. movies (10)
5. goth (15) 15. red dwarf (10)
6. sex (13) 16. chocolate (10)
7. cats (12) 17. heavy metal (10)
8. terry pratchett (12) 18. nine inch nails (10)
9. computers (11) 19. punk (10)
10. anime (11) 20. art (9)
Interests gestalt
My most interesting friend is who has 16 of these interests,
followed by (15), (15) and (14).
Normality Index
My friends are 90.23% normal.
Analyze me !
Username:
Popular interests created by _imran_



This counts, it says, interests shared by my friends, the ones in bold are the ones I myself actually have. So it doesn’t mean I have the most in common with Seph, but it means he has the most in common with the rest of you. For those of you that aren’t Seph, I’d be afraid ;-) Interesting though.

The BBC has announced plans for an annual John Peel day. I approve of this, still can’t listen to Home truths without wishing he was presenting, and so many songs remind me of his voice or intro in so many different ways.

Then, of course, there’s the Flying Spaghetti Monster, which is getting mentioned in blogs everywhere today. I especially like the feedback he’s gotten from actual members of the Kansas board of education.

Work has got very dull; it’s still summer, so it doesn’t feel like I should be starting the after season analysis, but it’s either that or tidy the desk. Glad that I’ve got Julie to help in the office, but she keeps finishing jobs and asking for new ones before I’ve had a chance to think of something. Ah well.

August 24th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | one comment

London’s hot…

Weekend in London, for those who’d forgotten ;-) Friday before the club
Journey up was cool, I’m beginning to like coach travel, I can sit, read, walk up and down the aisle if need be and I’ve never encountered a random nut. I read the first Sin City collection, and Tom Holt’s Portable Door (which is worth a read if you’re looking for light and amusing, which I was at the time). Got to Victoria, negotiated the tude and got directions from in order to get to the Dev(onshire Arms, Camden), but promptly took a wrong turn outside Camden Town tube. Fortunately, I bumped into Marie, who pointed me int he right direction and we chatted a little; she was flyering for a club that wasn’t S-C, which meant she wouldn’t be joining us. Ah well.

The Dev is cool, I’d never been there before and am glad it didn’t shut. Walked in (brief bag check at the door, to be expected), and Mike shouted hello. He was sat at a table with a rather cute young lady, so I joined them. Mike introduced us, and we slowly gathered more people until eventually we were all gathered and able to leave. Louise (gothic Britney for Exeter types) hasn’t changed much, she just wears less these days) eventually arrived with her bloke, so we were off; the other half agreed to meet us at the club, and we wandered, me with bags on shoulder.

First to Kings X, where I managed to get the last £20 note out of the only working cashpoint (much to Loiuse’s blokes chagrin, and ours as we had to find more cashpoints), but it was rather amusing. We then met/found Logan, who I recognised instantly as another former Bunker regular but beyond that didn’t really know him. Went tot he pub he works in, met up with Christy, Ashley and bloke; didn’t recognise them at first, then remembered them, more Exeter types. Um, why was London full of people from Devon? Still, we stayed in the pub for a bit, then wandered off to the club (this took some badgering, my bags were heavy, and turning up there after 11pm involves the long queue which I didn’t fancy).
Synthetic Culture
Was cool. said hello almost immediately, and was pointed out to me; he’d not only made it, but had an attractive girl draped all over him. Which explained why I didn’t notice him at first. Chatted a lot, to various people, wandered around the club, even danced a little. As usual, too hot to stay inside for too long, and can never decide which floor to stay on. The new(ish?) top floor DJ, ? impressed while I was up there, but I’ve never liked the top floor dance area much, always seems cramped, like an afterthought.

Met who is, um, interesting? Or would completely crackers be a better description? Still, having her point out to the rest of us which direction to look at for the next attractive girl in revealing outfit was useful, she’s better at it than I am; impressive. Good taste though. Fatigue did get the better of me eventually; got a big hug from the cute girl I met in the Dev, she’d by that time hooked up with some bloke, but I was barely coherent by that stage. At the end of the evening, I suggested to and that we go upstairs so we could sit. This we did, but immediately we got there my body rebelled and I pretty much switched off, so apologies for the lack of conversation.

Travelled hom in the early hours, interesting to get back to Mike’s as the sun rose. Slept a lot.
Saturday
We, um, slept. Probably a good point that we never actually arranged to meet up with anyone, Mike woke up before me, but neither of us was int he mood to do much, I think I actually managed coherence at about 2pm, but didn’t manage to move for at least 2 hours after that. Finished Portable Door, Mike played games, I collected the Crusade DVDs (, remind me to bring them up for you?) and we decided to go into Wimbledon to get some food as his flat didn’t have any and I couldn’t be arsed to think. Found a dirt cheap but very good basic cafe, worth remembering if ever in need of something very basi near his place. We then split up, he drove off ti his parents, I went into town.

Checked into a hotel, with the intention of having a quick shower and going into town or possibly going to Slimelight. Um, yeah. Collapsed on the bed, grabbed the next book (King Rat by Miéville) and read/dozed/slept. Ah well, the bed was comfortable and the room was OK.
Sunday
Checked out of hotel, left my heavy bag and the read books in the luggage room, sorted my bus ticket out at Victoria (decided to take the 18.30 back) and then started walking. All before noon; surely some mistake?

Wandered to the river, no particular plan, found Battersea and the dogs home, and eventually took a tube to Camden after getting fed up with building sites blocking the Thames Walk. Nice though; need to buy shoes designed for walking/dancing instead of the office. In Camden, I went to the Greek/whatever cafe north of the Lock; they do a damn fine Frappé. Wondered around the markets and lock area, love the place, then headed back, noticing Virgin had another sale on I wondered in. 3 DVD purchases later (Clockwork ORange, PRincess Bride, Citizen Kane) I left, and went to the station. Um, you aren’t allowed to take a tube from Camden on Sunday afternoons? WTF? Admittedly, it was pretty much impossible to get to the entrance, swarms of people leaving. So, I decided to walk to KEntish Town. The map made it look close. Stopped at a bookstore half way, bought 3 books (Fforde’s TN-3 and 2 real life politics/history related books) and eventually got the tube to Bank.

OK, riddle me this. Bank station is right next to the Old Lady; this makes sense. In the same square as the Bank is also Mansion House, where the Lord Mayor lives. This makes sense. Why is the tube station called Mansion House nowhere near? Still, good to see it all in daylight, architecture and old buildings always appeal. Then walked to the river to see the wobbly/Millenium Bridge. Looked cool, couldn’t be arsed to walk across it, so sat and read for a bit. Then walked along the riverside, grabbed a snack in a cafe and headed towards Victoria by way of Covent Garden and Leicester Square.

Nearly got lost finding the coach station, but got the bus on time and read the rest of King Rat on the way home; for his first novel, it’s damn good, and his later stuff is much better. Looking forward to his next book now.

Have I mentioned I love London? A great weekend, and I’m really considering looking into options to move there now. It occurs I could go up there to do a PGCE, but living in London while completely skint may not be the best plan.

August 23rd, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | 13 comments

I blame <lj user=”markslut”>

http://tinyurl.com/4lhwr

In other news, guess what? I’m taking the later coach.

August 19th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | 3 comments

Nothing like a good rant before you turn in for the night…

A flame war broke out on , and, well, my strong opinions kicked in.

A rant is here.

I expect to find an inbox full of flames when I get back from London. Better go clean out the large filesize junk Mozilla doesn’t download before I sign off. G’night all.

http://www.pledgebank.com/refuse

August 19th, 2005 Posted by MatGB | Uncategorized | 4 comments